Whole Lotta Love

We are down to the top nine and everyone is dressed in black and white in anticipation of performing songs from their own personal icons.  I am not going to spend much time on the meeting with Tommy Hilfiger in the Authentic Icon boutique.  All they did was stare at him like deer in headlights because he drones on like a math teacher.

Now let’s get to the meat…The legendary Stevie Nicks is our icon this week and OHRS treats us to some vintage footage of Stevie and Jimmy Iovine jammin’ out in the studio.  We love Stevie and we can’t wait to see her work her mentoring magic, even she endorses “Coke”.

Colton Dixon is up first and he is thrilled that Stevie is a fan of him and his hair.  He is going to sing “Everything” by Lifehouse and Jimmy and Stevie call him the third dark horse.  He looks like he is in pain when he sings, judges love it, Steven calls him a “dream come true for a judge on Idol”, he has star quality and he is over the top.  JHO was moved and the DAWG loved his “fly” white coat.  DAWG thinks he is believable and feels his passion, and calls him a “contender for the title”.

Skylar is ready to sing “Gunpowder and Lead” by Miranda Lambert.  Stevie is into it and starts singing along, Jimmy notes that Skylar may be in jeopardy if she doesn’t hit it just right.  Her wardrobe choice is a bit confusing because she is wearing a tablecloth like shirt and a cropped studded leather jacket.  Crowd goes wild for her and JHO loves her energy, Steven calls her “over the top”, which must be his phrase of the evening.  DAWG reminded her to tell the story and likes her range and says he hasn’t seen that since Carrie, which is a compliment coming from the DAWG.  The wardrobe department needs to be put on a “time out”.  Poor choice for Skylar, we will get to Elise and her sparkly bell bottoms later.

Colton, Elise, and Dave Matthews treat us to a Fleetwood Mac medley and Steven calls it “most excellent”.  He says he had dinner with Mick Fleetwood for his birthday last week.  C’mon Steven, you don’t have to name drop, you are too cool for school!

Hey Jun decided to rethink his approach in light of the criticism he received for being the class clown last week.  Jimmy said we got a “He New Jun” this week.  He is going to sing “A Song For You” by Don Hathaway.  He gets a standing O from the judges and Steven said he turned it around, JHO said it was beautiful and moving, and DAWG said JHO hit it on the head and calls him “buttery and beautiful.”  He isn’t a coffee cake, DAWG!

Hollie is up next to sing “Jesus Take the Wheel” by Carrie Underwood.  Stevie urges her to connect emotionally and gives her an example of her mother dying.  Stevie became very emotional and whispered words of wisdom to little Hollie.  She does an outstanding job and the judges are chit chatting, but DAWG seems a bit hesitant.  He didn’t think it was perfect, pitchy in the lower parts.  The audience boos and he explains what “constructive criticism” is, air quotes and all.  JHO disagrees and thought it was one of her best.  Steven decides to go somewhere in the middle and wished she had sung a different song.

Milli Vanilli takes the stage next and Stevie and Jimmy laugh because Stevie used to have the same hair do.  He selects the song “Sometimes I Cry” by Eric Benet.  Sidebar:  Eric Benet is probably better known as the ex Mr. Halle Berry.  The perf is a little boring and lackluster for me, not my cup of tea.  However, the judges suck it up and give a standing O.  Steven jumps in first and felt the passion and said he “gave Prince a run for his money”.  JHO thinks he is unique and has a voice you don’t hear every day, she urges America to pick up the phone and vote so that she can hear his voice a few more weeks.  Which is funny, because it implies he will not win.  DAWG says it was “ol’ school throwback R & B” and DeAndre is “back in da’ house!”

Jessica Sanchez is going to take on Beyoncé with “Sweet Dreams”.  Stevie likes that she made it into a ballad and notes that Jessica is a good student.  Jessica is wearing a dress with a mullet, which I am not a fan of, but our little resident powerhouse pulls of the song and she has props!  As she strolls through the five red prop doors, the judges swoon.  JHO loved the rendition and wanted more, Steven thought the dress was beautiful and called the song “delicious”, DAWG feels stars are truly born and compliments her on her maturity and innate talent.  Jessica reveals after the commercial break that she also has an alter ego like Beyoncé and it’s “BB Chez”, who we were introduced to this evening.  MMMMMKAY…

DeAndre, Mantasia, and Hey Jun treat us to a Michael Jackson medley.  JHO thought it was great, but a good think they were not here for “So You Think You Can Dance”.

Dave Matthews is up to sing “Still Rainin” by Johnny Lang.  Steve thinks he has “magic” and she says he would have been asked to join Fleetwood Mac if he was around back then.  Stevie thinks he’s gorgeous and Jimmy says he looks like Lindsey from 1974.  Jimmy gets a bit testy, but Stevie strokes his ego by saying “you were gorgeous, and still are, you had the little Greek body of life, you were darling and still are.”  Jimmy feels better, but I just threw up in my mouth.  Phillip gets the third standing O from the judges, but Steven is a little slow on the take.  JHO says she feels the music, she feels how present he is in the moment.  Steven feels the same way, “but there’s still someone in there tryin’ to climb out.”  DAWG is so happy, he loves Johnny Lang, he’s a friend, he loves the individuality, and gives him “big props”.

Mantasia is going to sing “Without You” by Mariah.  Jimmy says it’s one of the top five hardest songs to sing.  Mantasia makes his way out of the creepy wilderness props and delivers.  He is very emotional at the end of the song and another standing O.  DAWG is name dropping again saying that he just talked to Maria and if she was listening, she would be proud.  He called Mantasia “flawless” and said that he delivered the emotion.  Steven says he pushed beyond his limits and JHO calls him a “phenom” and he is something special.

Hollie, Skylar, and Jessica sing a rather karaoke Madonna medley.  IT’s become painfully evident that the wardrobe department is trying to camouflage Skylar’s junk in da’ trunk, but it appears the outfit choices call more attention to it.  DAWG called it fun and liked Skylar’s “twang”.

Elise is rounding out the night with “Whole Lotta Love” by Led Zepplin.  Jimmy said Elise murdered it.  They loved Elise so much, Stevie sang “Dreams” with her and said she would hire Elise in a second.  She delivers a unique performance, which gets the crowd rockin’ and slowly urges the judges out of their seats.  JHO starts screaming “I didn’t wanna get up!”  Is that a backhanded compliment or is she just lazy?  Steven said she pulled it off and JHO called her a “rock star”.  DAWG said something is in the air and everybody is in it to win it.  OHRS points out that Elise and Steven are wearing the same pants.  How cute.  Elise deserves mad props for this because it was a really difficult song to pull off, but she did it perfectly.  Performance of the night, point blank to the period.

Five standing O’s later…who will go home?  OHRS has Aerosmith breaking news, which isn’t really breaking…they are going on the “Global Warming Tour” and Steven wonders if he can say “Ass” on TV.  This results show has really become a giant info-mercial.  OHRS shows off the tweets from the contestant’s icons, which of course are all hearts and flowers.  Milli Vanilli didn’t get a tweet, but since Eric Benet was not busy, he delivered the props in person.

Elise, Dave Matthews, and Hollie are first up to face their fate.  Jimmy gives Elise props and says it was “one of the most transporting things” that can happen.  He thinks she may also do well in the 80’s theme next week.  Phillip impressed Stevie and Jimmy agrees that she is rarely wrong and we are witnessing a big star being born.  Little Hollie did a beautiful job, but Jimmy thinks she lacks experience.  OHRS calls out to “Karen” to dim the lights and he sends Hollie to the stools of death.  Elise and Phillip are safe.

After that nonsense, OHRS calls Colton, Mantasia, and Hey Jun to center stage.  The ever diabolical Jimmy didn’t think Colton was good enough, he thought Mantasia delivered 85% of the song.  The emotion cut off his voice, but he enjoyed Mantasia during the MJ medley.  Hey Jun still doesn’t impress Jimmy.  OHRS cuts up, it should be “harsh tag Jimmy, not hash tag Jimmy”.  With that OHRS sends Hey Jun to the stools of death and Colton and Mantasia are in the clear.  Mantasia also makes his way over to hug Elise who hangs in the balance.  That kid is a class act.

Skylar, Milli Vanilli, and Jessica are summoned for the moment of truth.  Jimmy enjoyed Skylar, but she needs to go for more melodic songs, but he felt she rose to the top during the Madonna medley.  Milli didn’t drive Jimmy wild and he feels there is still something missing.  Jimmy finds Jessica talented beyond her years and he wants to see more girl power.  OHRS sends Skylar to the stools of death and Jessica and DeAndre are safe.

Skylar and Hollie are spared and Hey Jun makes a reprise of last night’s song during his “sing for life”.  Dave Matthews looks on, tearily, wondering who will entertain him in the big, lonely mansion.

The judges huddle together and pretend to “discuss” scarves and halter tops whether or not they will use their one precious save.

We all know it won’t happen, as JHO’s eyeliner runs, OHRS prompts them for an answer.  Steven says “for the record you knew this was coming” as if to soften the blow.  See ya’ funny man!


One thought on “Whole Lotta Love

  1. I was talking with Cheryl toward the end of performance night, and told her that if you were watching live, you were going nuts over Elise’s perf. I couldn’t believe it.

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